Have you ever had a conversation come full stop because you can’t think of how to respond to what the other person just said? Or maybe the conversation didn’t stop completely, but you missed an opportunity to go deeper into a particular area… or reach consensus… or gain clarity because you didn’t understand exactly what the other person was saying and you didn’t know how to ask for clarification, or were too afraid to admit you didn’t understand?

Well, there is a simple answer to take all the pressure off. You don’t have to be smart about that particular subject. You don’t have to understand the nuances and context of what they are saying. You just have to be brave enough to say three words: “tell me more”.

This simple phrase tells the person you are interested in learning more about what they are saying. It shows them you are committed and sticking around… you are not simply hoping to get out of the discussion soon. It says you are smart enough to know there is more to the story. And it opens conversational doorways you didn’t even realize exist… the other person will open them for you. You just have to say the magic words! And they will appreciate the opportunity to explain further what they are talking about.

Connecting with other people is one of the most important and meaningful ways we spend our time. For those of us with introverted tendencies, this can be challenging. Don’t let your own lack of understanding or ability to respond be a blocker. Just ask “tell me more” and they will give you what you are looking for.

#KeepTheMomentumGoing #EQ #RelatingToOThers

#EQ #Empathy

The Golden Rule tells us to “treat others how you want to be treated”. On the surface, this sounds much more pleasant than “treat others in any way that achieves your own goals”.

But wouldn’t it be more effective to “treat others how THEY want to be treated”? Isn’t this full of empathy? Doesn’t this create an understanding of the person across from us and see things from their point of view (POV)? Isn’t the old saying a little bit narcissistic and judgemental (think of it my way!). Yes sometimes the other person’s POV needs correcting or avoiding, but often it’s important to honor the lens they see through rather than reacting to them in the way you think you would want someone to react.

The Golden Rule helped shape modern progress… but it’s time to level up our EQ game.

#EQ #Empathy

Here is a short video from Brene Brown focusing on how we can use empathy to treat others well when they are in pain. Beyond this focused message, the concept of empathy applies to so many other situations that build human connection (and will likely be referenced in many future posts).